Snow White

I write this post feeling absolutely overwhelmed by God’s love and grace.  I am broken before the cross of Christ reflecting on the sacrifice that was made for ME!  I know this should be an ever-apparent thought in my daily life, but quite honestly it’s not.  I so easily forget.  I distract myself with everything else.  I’m in the middle of this book study that has grown and stretched me like crazy.  The book is called “What Women Fear” by Angie Smith.  So each week on the (in)courage website two chapters are discussed via video.  The chapter that was reviewed today is called “The First Stone: Fear Of My Past Catching Up To Me.”  The story from the Bible that Angie illustrated this with is the story of the adulterous woman being brought before Jesus by the Pharisees.  The Pharisees were reciting the law saying that anyone caught in adultery should be stoned.  They waited for Jesus’ response, hoping to have a charge to bring against him.  They wanted to find blame in the One who was completely blameless.  Jesus responds by bending down to write something on the ground he was standing on.  He then stands up and tells the Pharisees, "Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her."  Jesus again bent down to write something on the ground, and as he did that the accusers walked away one by one.  Now, I’m not going to go into anything specifically about my past…I have one…so does everyone else.  If I’m being real, I really do have a fear that my past will catch up to me.  Yeah, I don’t show it in a noticeable way, or I don’t try to scramble around covering up my past, but I do let it get the best of my thought life sometimes.  What if what I did back then shows its ugly head in my life today?  What if a punishment is waiting for me around the corner?  Just like the adulterous woman, I’m waiting for someone to throw the first stone.  A line in the chapter that struck my heart was: “I am convinced that the enemy preys on our memories and regrets, and taunts us with the many ways in which we have failed God.”  So true!  Guess what though?!?!  The beauty of the cross of Christ covers me in forgiveness and grace!  I have most definitely asked God to forgive me for those times in my life, so I have to choose to believe and take God at his word when He says that my sins are as far away from being held against me as the east is from the west.  I am forgiven.  I am clean.  Angie describes Jesus in this way (which I looooove her wording!): “[Jesus is] The shame-lifter, the God-made-man, the burden-carrier, the lover of my soul…with forgiveness and grace like I had never known.”  It absolutely takes my breath away.  I’m just going to continue to use Angie’s words and leave you with one more quote from her book: “The Lord has delighted in the grace that washes you white as snow.  White.  As.  Snow.”   

Here It Goes!

I’m just gonna lay this right out on the table: I’m extremely hesitant when it comes to the blog world.  When the thought came into my mind, “Maybe I’ll start a blog!”, I pretty quickly jumped to the conclusion that it would never last and I’d drop it like a hot potato in a months’ time…if that!  Lately, I have been so inspired by other women’s blogs that have the ability to bring me to the place of encouragement, motivation, or allow me to laugh out loud at the computer screen as if it magically turned into a human being sitting in front of me telling me a funny story. 

When I think about doing something BIG…meaning it’s going to take a lot of commitment…I think…and think…and think…

I get so wrapped up in my thoughts that it paralyzes me to actually DO anything.  So, I wanted to break that habit by really truly following through and starting this blasted blog.  With all this thinking, I realized that there is a definite fear of failure too.  As I was in the midst of my thinking process, I read a chapter in a book I’ve been working through that talks about the fear of failure.  Let me just share a few choice nuggets with you that really grabbed my attention:

“Sometimes the fear of failure steals the beauty we were meant to create.”

“Assuming that God is calling you to do something, you will fail by being disobedient, not by a lack of success at the task.”

“Our natural reaction when we fear failure is either to hightail it out of that situation, or perhaps more likely, to procrastinate.”

Um, can I get an AMEN on that last one!?!?  I’ve been out of college for a number of years, but when I was the studious student back in the day “procrastination” was my middle name.  FEAR OF FAILURE.  One thing I know for sure though…I may have procrastinated beginning this blog out of my fear of failure, but I am praying that God uses my fear to bring Himself glory.  Maybe…just maybe God will use my blog to reach others just like many of the other blogs I’ve come across recently.  Maybe some place, somewhere, someone can relate.  So, here it goes!